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Here's what you must do: Take your "shaft" and link the cut off part. Stick it back into place. The spit will hold it there long enough for you to take two sporks and make a lightswhich out of them. Then, using the excrement of a baby velocirator, attach the lightswhich to your shaft. Then flip it on and presto! Fixed! YOUR WELCOME.

UNITED STATES / MAY 27, 2016 9:56 AM EST

in response to: i accidentally castrated my shaft help
Whats the difference between dead babies and onions? I dont laugh when I cut up an onion

UNITED STATES / MAY 23, 2016 6:21 PM EST

in response to: What's the difference between a dead baby girl and a sandwich? I don't fuсk the sandwich before I eat it.
not at all, I think it's cute. I bet if you can print it you can get your mommy to hang it on the fridge!

UNITED STATES / MAY 23, 2016 2:39 PM EST

in response to: How rude is this: ┌∩┐(-_-)┌∩┐?
Just take a knife and cut your fuc king stomach open you fuc king idiot.

UNITED STATES / MAY 21, 2016 3:26 PM EST

in response to: I had a dream where my friend and I were making out, what's this supposed to mean? I NEVER had an attraction to her and I still don't have an attraction to her now. In fact, I'm in love with someone COMPLETELY different. So why did I dream of her instead of who I ACTUALLY really like?
Good! That means your dick was cut off before you did that.

UNITED STATES / MAY 20, 2016 5:45 PM EST

in response to: How do you make a four year old cry twice? Wipe your bloody dick on her teddy bear.
I choose Door #3- cut 'em both down and use them for firewood next winter.

UNITED STATES / MAY 20, 2016 9:40 AM EST

in response to: Two trees divided by a fairly large creek. Their limbs reaching out for each other. Forever apart. Forever longingly wanting each other. Which would be better a painting, or a photograph?
I would if you would cut out the childish nonsense and post like an adult.

UNITED STATES / MAY 19, 2016 10:23 AM EST

in response to: Am bored... Wanna hang out w me for a lil?
I like Okies... I think it's cute!

UNITED STATES / MAY 18, 2016 11:11 PM EST

in response to: Okies, how are things? Can you tell me something nice and new from yer day?? Plz! 😊
It would take a pretty weird or desperate woman to put up with JC. Fine with me if they leave and cuts down on the bitchin'.

UNITED STATES / MAY 17, 2016 1:37 PM EST

in response to: Why does JC scare off women?
Sweetie! You are so cute.

UNITED STATES / MAY 16, 2016 11:27 PM EST

in response to: Yo' problem be dat ya' live in some traila' park in de middle uh nowhere. Many uh us Americans live in happenin' cities likes NYC, Chicago, o' in mah' case, Mo-town. You's is jealous, and t'dull dat jealousy, assume all Americans as Redneck honky sucka's. De trud be much betta' dan dat, and ya' kin't handle it. Man!
We derive cuteness from human infants. Anything that has a proportionally big head and fat body, we consider cute.

UNITED STATES / MAY 16, 2016 6:32 PM EST

in response to: why are chubby things cute?
Mine is cute. Nice combination of orange and white with black attachments.

UNITED STATES / MAY 12, 2016 9:45 PM EST

in response to: Tree fell down across the road. There is no other path to your home. You have none of the following: ax, chainsaw or machete. How do you get home?
Bobcats are so cute.

UNITED STATES / MAY 12, 2016 9:41 PM EST

in response to: Tree fell down across the road. There is no other path to your home. You have none of the following: ax, chainsaw or machete. How do you get home?
Go out to dad's garage work bench and look around. Screwdriver handles work well. Box-end wrenches are also good, come in different sizes to accommodate your changing needs, but are fairly flat. Don't use an open-end wrench. They have sharp edges which can nick and cause bleeding. And it is really tough to put a Band-Aid on a cut up in there.

UNITED STATES / MAY 12, 2016 8:01 AM EST

in response to: What are some tiny household items I can shove up my vulva and be painful?
eyebrow cuts usually look quite stylish anyway so why change.

UNITED STATES / MAY 8, 2016 2:52 PM EST

in response to: When I was young I cut the top of my eyebrow with scissors and now it won't grow back how can I fix this
Been there. Really sucks, doesn't it? Do what I did- graduate high school, go to college for a couple years, get drafted, get sent to some shithole of a country in southeast Asia for a year, then work for a little over 40 years for various people. Then when those asswipes cut your benefits package, retire just before the cuts take effect, keeping yourself under the old system. (continued next answer ...)

UNITED STATES / MAY 5, 2016 8:38 AM EST

in response to: What to do when you hate your teacher SO F**KIN MUCH?!
shes cute... not the hottest ever

UNITED STATES / MAY 4, 2016 2:53 PM EST

in response to: Hottest woman ever?
I have a brain but when I had abdominal surgery the surgeon cut out the belly button and made a straight cut. It does look weird.

UNITED STATES / MAY 2, 2016 6:43 PM EST

in response to: could sombody get ellen degenres to show her belly button please? its missing.
I have been addicted to cutting for 6 years. Stop before you get addicted. Throw out your blades, lighters, smashed glass or whatever you use. Care for your wounds. When you feel like cutting, think about your parents response if they find out, think about ending up in the ER after cutting too deep think about the marks you will have over your body, think about your friends or a partner. Call a friend, watch a movie with family to distract yourself and write a list of reasonings not to.

UNITED STATES / APR 30, 2016 2:54 AM EST

in response to: For a few years now, I've been struggling with some mental stuff along with self harm. I hesitate to say I have depression or anxiety because I haven't been to a doctor. I'm a teen that would rather not clue my parents into what I've been going through, even though I've wanted to go to the doctor for a little while now. And I know that even after the endless internet research I've done, that self-diagnosis is still iffy. I'm just very lost, and I don't know what to do. Please leave advice.
how i'm going to hide my self harm cuts and bruises from my parents

UNITED STATES / APR 30, 2016 7:39 PM EST

in response to: So, what's on your mind?
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