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l like to play my bongos in the morning!


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Why is there so much garbage on morning tv?

UNITED STATES / SEP 2, 2017 11:35 AM EST

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What's the first thing you see in the morning when you look in the mirror?

UNITED STATES / AUG 29, 2017 12:10 PM EST

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My 600lb wife told me this morning that she has never in her life seen her Hoo-Ha. She has no idea what it looks like. She wants me to take a pic and show it to her. Question is should I just let her use a selfie stick or should I just shoot the pic myself?


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I caught my father jerking off to a photo of me? I know he loves me, but is this a little to far? Once in the middle of the night, he tried having sex with my while I was asleep, but I woke up. That morning I asked him about it and he says he was sleep walking, He's always touching my leg and running his fingers up and down it and licking his lips whenever he looks at my va*gina. What do I do?

UNITED STATES / AUG 3, 2017 11:29 PM EST

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Good morning. I have a small dick.

UNITED STATES / JUL 27, 2017 9:42 AM EST

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Good morning you stupid nіgger cunts

UNITED STATES / JUL 13, 2017 1:23 PM EST

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Well it's official. My 500lb wife is now a 600lb wife. 608 on our Toledo platform scale this morning. I'm so proud of her that I want to give her a pearl necklace....or maybe a dozen roses and a rim job...which one would be best for the occasion?

UNITED STATES / JUL 11, 2017 3:09 PM EST

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So much to do!! 😝 I was supposed to go upstate for the week starting this morning to look after grandpa, but that'll have to wait till tomorrow. I have to do some adulting today. Call me health insurance and find a Dr. a GP near me who takes my insurance, I've recently switch insurances, annd I also have to assign my dentist (who's recently moved) to my insurance plan.. Have to be back in the city Thursday, see my therapist Friday, and work Saturday/Sunday.. .

UNITED STATES / JUL 10, 2017 12:00 PM EST

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"Morning Shít" Acrylic and poop on a shingle 888 x 800

UNITED STATES / JUL 7, 2017 10:06 PM EST

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What should I do- My 15 almost 16 year old sister throws temper tantrums, sticks her tongue out at everyone, stomps her feet, and calls our father whenever we call her out. I am currently 13 and she drives me crazy, me and my grandmother must wake her up in the morning and then she throws a tantrum at us. Our dad completely disregards what she is doing and showers her in praise and buys things for her although all she does is lay around and stuff her face


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In the morning waking up to terrible sunlight All diffuse like skin abuse the sun is half its size When you talk you hardly even look in my eyes In the morning, in the morning In the doorway holding every letter that I wrote In the driveway pulling away putting on your coat In the ocean washing off my name from your throat In the morning, in the morning


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I'm still reeling over the fact that my huge fat wife went into labor this morning. Aren't surprise pregnancies a bitch?

UNITED STATES / JUN 28, 2017 5:39 PM EST

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Can you still get it up every morning?

UNITED STATES / JUN 16, 2017 8:59 AM EST

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Good morning!! Such a nice day out!! ☺️ Gonna go down to the lake this morning... feed the fish. ☺️

UNITED STATES / JUN 14, 2017 11:16 AM EST

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I weighed myself his morning...because it's Monday not because I wanted to!!! For some reason I was feeling very sexy. Do you ever do that?

UNITED STATES / JUN 12, 2017 9:34 PM EST

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I used to have a clock radio and my local radio station played "roxanne" by the police on the morning of 9/11. "Roxanne you don't have to put on the red light. Those days are over you don't have to sell your body to the night. Your carcass will be incinerated under a load of steel and concrete you worthless fuсking whore"


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Does she have a crush on me? There is this girl that used to always take my hat in class. We always used to make fun of each other. And this morning she stayed to watch me play piano. What should I do and does she like me?

UNITED STATES / MAY 30, 2017 6:28 PM EST

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Good morning you stupid motherfuсkers.

UNITED STATES / MAY 30, 2017 9:52 AM EST

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Do you like running along the seashore in the morning?

UNITED STATES / MAY 25, 2017 12:11 PM EST

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